Descent into a Nightmare

My recovery has been very slow going... and quite painful. None of the pain is related to the meniscus tear however, it has all been related to the instruments that were in my leg.

Our lives since yesterday however took a horrific and horrible turn of events however...

It was supposed to be the last day of my recovery, however in the morning my wife went to the restroom and miscarried our baby at 16 weeks. She began screaming and crying in the bathroom when it began.

The bathroom... there was blood everywhere.

I rushed her to the hospital and they started giving her fluids and again... there was blood everywhere.

Her heart rate was way high and I sat next to her and held her hand and just talked to her.

The doctor came in... and in our entire history of doctors, we had one of the most kind and very compassionate ones I have ever seen, someone who handled our nightmare with a gentle voice and with compassion. However, the nurse was one of those people who should seriously think before she opens her mouth.

I got the wife to calm down and we began to talk... we began to wonder what happened.

The last several days she made mention of the fact that the baby did not kick or move.

I did not think anything of it then, but her words are re-playing in my head now.

I then made her smile and laugh a little. Some tension was broken. There were still plenty of tears to come, but for now her heart rate was normal... her blood pressure was normalizing.

Then the time came and they let us go home and while the body of this baby boy was at the hospital, there was the entire bathroom I had to contend with. It looked like a slasher flick was being filmed in my bathroom. There was blood all over the place, from the bathtub, sink, toilet, floor, walls.... it was literally everywhere.

I had cried enough at this point... and this was my wife, so my normally weak stomach was as solid as steel.

With my very painful knee screaming at me... I got down on my hands and knees and began the long laborious process of cleaning up the bathroom.

I almost filled an entire 13 gallon trash bag with old clothes, towels, paper towels... all soaked with blood.

Once I was done, I had to get her comfortable and then I had to go out... back to the hospital... just to get all of the stitches out of my knee.

I later went out and bought alcohol... and a new video game to keep the kids occupied. They have been wanting that Lego Indiana Jones game... and it is easy enough for the 4 year old to play.

Now, while I was writing this... there was yet...ANOTHER turn of events. The wife, while given a clean bill of health is still weak from blood loss. She got up out of the living room chair too fast to get pain medication and come lie down in here. She walked over to me as I was sitting here and then passed right the hell out... she just dropped... and I literally thought she had just died. Her eyes were starring up at the ceiling and there was this strange noise coming from the back of her throat and then... she was really still and silent. I quickly felt for a pulse and kept calling out her name and then suddenly she was back and awake. She thought she was having a nap.

My heart is just now calming down... she is awake and fine. She just got up too fast... I am pumping her with liquids and keeping an eye on her. I was going to take her to the hospital, but she is serious in that she just got up too fast and she feels great right now.

The hospital said her blood count was fine, she has had one more occasion of blood loss... no where near what she had yesterday. Her body is just getting back to normal is all that it is...

I just told her that she needs to stay the hell in bed unless she has to get up to use the restroom.

So we are now in the present... right here.

So I am going to leave a song for the wife here... I have a playlist called "Songs that Make Life Worth Living". Made up of what I consider the best songs ever written...

04 Three Little Birds

Bob Marley & The Wailers